The Day Parenting Became Illegal 2

Cute is a direct predictor of pain in the ass level

Cute is a direct predictor of pain in the ass level

To the Woman Who Witnessed my 2 year old’s tantrum,

I’m sure you don’t remember me. We were both waiting at the local doctor’s office some time ago. You were sitting there sipping your iced latte fiddling on your expensive iPhone with your perfectly pedicured nails in your childless bliss. I was that woman all the way across the clinic in the child-play area struggling red faced with a tantruming 2 year old. I really appreciate you taking the time to call the police and tell them I was abusing my child during his over 10 minute long tantrum erupted by a sucker he dropped on a dirty medical floor that I wouldn’t let him have back. (Oh, the humanity!) I apologize that holding him in my lap while he spazzed out offended you.

Next time though, if you want to be a good citizen, why not ask the medically trained staff who ALSO saw said fit about your delusions, being all four of them the officer (whose time you wasted) interviewed, said that I was “exceptionally calm” even though he was biting and hitting me (It’s a fun stage). One said “I was surprised how calmly she handled him actually, a lot of parents would have gotten upset.” Not me, not the 5 months pregnant lady with the flu and a screaming kid. Next time, maybe you could even offer to help or at least set down your Facebook games long enough to properly access the situation.

You also might want to consider the validity of your statements when a doctor, you know with a medical degree, saw my child within 10 minutes of said fit for a complete physical and noted not even a red mark which would be present had I been “hitting him repeatedly.” She noted a well-adjusted 2 year old getting over the flu, who was in “perfect health.”

You’ll be happy to know the officer who responded also has a 2 year old, and apologized to ME for having to come all the way out to my house. When he first arrived, I was confused, and by time he left I was furious, but then for a few months I was afraid. I love my children. I didn’t want them taken away. You fed that little piece of doubt every parent has, that itching feeling that you’re fucking your kids up one mistake at a time. You made me feel like a bad mom. I actually stopped taking my kids into public, and when I did, I catered to their every desire to avoid the inkling of a possibility that they may do what kids do when kids don’t get what they want—that you or someone like you may be lurking in the shadows ready to report round 2 and that there may not be such rock-solid witnesses this time.

But eventually I realized what a disservice to my children that was—that inconsistency in the rules, that deprival of social interaction with strangers, it was your fault. For a moment that fury in me came back, but it faded fast. Now, now I just want to feel sorry for you. You are part of the problem with our society. You are the reason perfectly good parents feel the need to look over their shoulders before they do anything—parent-like— worried it may be illegal, illegal to raise their children rather than observe them. I bet you’re also the type that hypocritically turns about and bitches about how unruly, rude, and disrespectful today’s youth is, and you don’t even see how you contributed to that. Someone that blind in life truly deserves my pity.

But I don’t know you to pity you, any more than you knew me to judge me. All I have to offer you is one single piece of advice, the next time you question the way someone else is parenting, or even just living their life, remember, the right way depends on where you’re trying to go.


The Good Mom



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2 thoughts on “The Day Parenting Became Illegal

  • Christie

    Hi there. I’ve read a few of your posts in the past hour and I agree with you.

    My kids are both grown now and I’ll probably be a grandma in the next few years but I am still very interested in the way parents are raising their children. I manage a hotel and my workforce is young, so the current trends of parenting practices affects me. Parents who give in to their kids’ demands now will give me headaches fifteen/twenty years in the future.

    Thankfully, I’ve witnessed some excellent parenting in the past couple of years that restores my faith that the whole world may be coming back to its senses. Parenting that I’ve seen in local restaurants, the grocery store, and in my hotel by parents from all over the world restores my faith.

    The woman who called the cops because you were “abusing” your son should have been charged with filing a false report. Did this happen in Alaska? I live in Alaska and I’m shocked if that happened here.

    So, keep up the good work, The Good Mom, and believe me that there are plenty of future employers who appreciate your efforts today. <3

    • unwirklich admin

      Yep, this was in Soldotna. Really surprised me as well, I thought people here still had some common sense. Thank you for reading– and still having common sense. lol