Now the proud mom of three adorable boys, I look back on my pregnancies and realize when they say, “every pregnancy is different,” they aren’t joking. Each pregnancy is indeed different. My first pregnancy was basically symptom-free, minus basket-ball-shaped weight gain. My second pregnancy was plagued with constant back pain and heart burn along with gestational diabetes. My third threw the ringer at me, resulting in basically every pregnancy symptom under the sun from nausea and migraines to itchy skin and excessive thirst. The question then becomes, why is each pregnancy different?
You are different
I was 22 during my first pregnancy and 26 during my third. The primary reason each pregnancy is different and you experience different pregnancy symptoms is because you are different. You’ve grown older. Your hormonal balance has shifted. Your mental state isn’t the same. The time between pregnancies ensures that you will not be exactly the same in a plethora of ways, so it’s logical that your pregnancy won’t be either.
Your baby is different
My first baby weighed 7.1 lbs. My second 8.15 lbs, and my third 9.47 lbs. The first and third are both slender boys, and the second is stocky and muscular. They have different skull shapes, body builds, and body chemistry. It doesn’t matter that all three are male, they are still quite different. The size and body chemistry of your baby can affect your pregnancy, likely more so than gender being that there is very little evidence to support the suggestion that your baby’s gender can cause different pregnancy symptoms in most cases.
When you consider that you and the baby are your pregnancy, and both of you are different, you would think that the drastic differences many women experience between pregnancies would be less shocking, but not really. Even after recognizing how different my first and second pregnancies were I worried throughout my third that something was wrong. My advice to those once again expecting is to take it as it comes. Treat each pregnancy like the first, and you’ll be far less confused and possibly concerned.
Like many multi-child mothers with same-sex children, I have my eye on a certain gender this pregnancy. While I’m not much for wives tales, one particular suggestion caught my more scientifically-swayed side. It’s often said that pregnancy symptoms can predict baby gender. This is suggested to be due to the difference in hormones a girl or boy baby require. A quick poll of pregnancy symptoms and sexes of said pregnancy’s offspring on my Facebook page for parents, which boosts about ten thousand, however, found no theme in pregnancy symptoms and sex of the child. Still curious, I voted to dig just a little deeper.
Do girls and boys really cause different hormone surges during pregnancy? Is it possible to predict baby gender based on pregnancy symptoms?
The real test of this wives tale lies solely in the supposed scientific basis. If it’s false that hormone levels don’t vary with the sex of your baby, then the whole idea is blown to diaper bits. Luckily, it isn’t false, at least based on studies done so far. Research does currently support that hormone levels vary depending on the sex of your baby as early as three weeks along.
Hormones high in girls to predict baby gender:
HCG–yes, that’s the same hormone that made your pregnancy test positive-has been shown to often be higher in mothers who are pregnant with little girls. This is why studies have also proven that women pregnant with girls experience higher rates of the pregnancy symptoms nausea and morning sickness. HCG is a known culprit of both.
Hormones high in boys to predict baby gender:
Testosterone: Beginning around week 7 and peaking around week 9 to 11, a surge of testosterone is actually what prompts the development of male sex organs. The lack thereof causes the development of female organs by the way, not a surge of estrogen or “female hormones.” While no studies were found to confirm a correlation between higher testosterone and indicative pregnancy symptoms, those would include increased hair growth, darkening of body hair, and/or excessive acne or oily skin.
There are, of course, other hormones secreted during pregnancy, and even by your baby in later weeks. These two are just the two that are suggested to surge, so to speak, sufficiently to cause a differentiation in symptoms. Keep in mind of course, that many women who experience horrible morning sickness have little boys, and many women who have hair changes or acne have girls.
Gender determination based on hormone levels hasn’t been proven reliable even with blood samples (excluding a DNA test). So, none of the above is really better than a wives tale, but it may at least offer you something to ponder while you wait for that gender-determining ultrasound moment.
Did this wives tale accurately predict baby gender for your pregnancy? It was for all three of my boys and for the little girl we are now expecting. You may also enjoy our baby gender determination quiz based on the science of gender swaying.
After nine to ten long months of pregnancy you’re likely hoping every little twitch is a contraction. You think to yourself, “maybe I’m in labor now, and I just don’t know it,” and if this is your first child, how are you supposed to know? When are you in true labor? Should you be at the hospital? What do contractions feel like? As a mom of four, I’ll do my best to answer all of the above.
What is a pregnancy contraction, and what does it do?
Chances are you know what the word contraction means, and you understand that muscles contract and relax in the body to create movement and support. What you might not know, is that while your uterus is not a muscle itself, it is lined with a thick layer of smooth muscle. Pregnancy contractions are just the tightening and release of this muscle, much like you see when you flex and then straighten your arm.
It’s a misconception that contractions start during labor. In reality, they start much, much earlier. As early as 6 weeks in fact, many women just don’t feel them until the second trimester or so. These early contractions work to help tone and strengthen your uterus for labor. Later contractions help ripen your cervix and move your baby into position for labor. During labor, they may also help promote blood flow to your baby.
What do contractions feel like: by type
What do braxton hicks contractions feel like?
Braxton hicks contractions are the warm up for the real thing. They generally are more uncomfortable than painful. As mentioned above, these early contractions aren’t frequently felt until the second trimester, sometimes in the third. They can be brought on by physical activity, dehydration, a full bladder, or sexual intercourse among other things. Some women never feel their baxton hicks contractions. They will be irregular and usually go away with time or position changes.
You can tell braxton hicks contractions from labor contractions by tracking their occurrence.
If your contractions are:
-not occurring in a rhythmic pattern (such as every 10 minutes)
-not holding a consistent length (such as 30 seconds each time)
-not increasing in frequency, duration, or strength
-not felt in more than just your abdomen (rather than your sides, back, etc)
-go away with position changes
They are likely braxton hicks contractions, also sometimes referred to as “false labor.”
What do early labor contractions feel like?
At least in all of my labors, there was a distinct difference between early labor contractions and OMG-here-the-baby-comes contractions. Early labor contractions will occur at a steady rate of time and not decrease or go away with time or position changes like braxton hicks. They mark the start of your labor and will feel again like a tightening of your abdominal muscles, but because early labor contractions do affect your cervix, they may cause slight pain or discomfort.
Once early labor contractions occur every 5 to 10 minutes you should get to a hospital or contact your care provider if you’re birthing at home. Early labor contractions also tend to be wave-like and do subside. Depending on your pain tolerance level, you may not really feel these. In my labor where my water did break, the machine at the hospital registered contractions far before I felt them. In fact, I was dilated to a 6 before I felt anything at all. (10 is time to push)
What are other signs of labor?
If you can’t feel these contractions, some other signs of labor include:
-Increased vaginal discharge, which may be gooey, thick, or blood tinged
-Dilation and effacement of the cervix
-Lightening, or the drop of your baby lower into your pelvis
-A leaking of fluid which may be mistaken for urine (your water breaking is not always a “gush” of fluid)
-Sudden lower back pain (this is actually from contractions)
What do transitional and active labor contractions feel like?
The only way I can think to explain the feeling of an active labor contraction is to image that achy painful throbbing that occurs when you smash a finger or toe. Now imagine this pain in your abdomen. As you move from active labor into transition (your actual delivery) you will also likely feel the urge to bear down and push or may feel like you have to poop. Some women equate the feeling of transitional labor contractions to that of very bad menstrual cramps. Either way, when contractions reach this extreme the baby is close. If you don’t have someone to deliver your baby, you need to get to them asap. Transitional labor contractions are less wave-like and hurt far more frequently. When these start you will know it.
In many labors, the bag of waters never breaks, mine didn’t with 2 of 4. Some women also lose a mucus plug from their cervix before or after early labor contractions begin. No single labor is the same and many women describe contractions in varying ways, but in my experience this is what contractions in the various forms feel like. I hope this has helped ease you’re wondering and waiting.
If you’re done waiting, congrats on your new baby! We’d love to hear how you would answer the question, “what do contractions feel like?”
